Do you guys remember when GTA: San Andreas came out? I sure as hell do. You just never forget the first time you stab a hapless man on the sidewalk to death, then collect his glowing stacks of cash. Of course I’ll also never forget Cheryl’s disgust and outrage.
“This is what your new game is about,” she shrieked, “stabbing people?”
Some arguments will never go away, and one such fracas is over whether violent video games cause a person to be violent. It is ridiculous. Playing violent video games does not make a person violent any more than reading the Bible or Quran makes one peaceful.
I regret that in our modern American democratic society it is more important that something sounds good than that it is factually accurate, but so it goes.
Now, If you are one of the brave few who read this blog regularly, you are aware that I have some strong opinions about how a person should conduct themselves in traffic. You know: eyes front, phone in the pocket, collar buttoned and cravat knotted smartly… that sort of thing.
It might come as a surprise, in that light, that I’d be as taken as I am with Hipster City Cycle, an iPhone game in which riders are encouraged to split lanes, run lights, and generally ride like any prize-class dickneck one might spot on N. Highland Ave. Remember, though, that’s what makes games fun: you get to do stuff you wouldn’t do in real life.
Here I am in Hipster City Cycle, posting up at the end of a race that I didn’t win (serious cycling faux pas):
And riding at the rear of the pack as usual:
And last but hardly least, what I think might be a Tom Waits joke:
I was contacted a while back by Alex Alsup, who is the marketing nipples to the Hipster City Cycle breasts. Like any good breasts, the HCC development team is free and independent, which is great news for their game’s spirit and terrible news for my hopes of being paid to write. Oh well, it’s a great game in any case.
Check it out if you have an iWhatever and some time to kill, secure in the knowledge that it won’t cause you to ride like an actual jerk in real life. Only you can do that!
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This is bullshit, Jim: no matter how smartly one’s cravat is knotted (and, really, it is at best a loose knot), buttoning one’s collar covers it completely. It would offer the discerning gentleman the unseemly appearance of a tumor, nodule or, Moses forbid, a Quaato.
Kyle I am shocked. You of all people should know that a cravat is always worn outside the collar. On the inside it is an ascot!
For shame!
Sir, we differ in perspective and facts.
Ascot is a type of knot for a cravat, according to top dandies and well-known fops. A cravat can generally refer to any kind of neckwear. In the day and more casual circumstances, it is tied with the Ascot knot and worn against the chest, inside the collar. Formal occasions call for top-level frou-frou actions: tied as a four-in-hand knot and outside the collar.
A significant point, though, is that most cyclists would be unable to properly sport them: Freds for their collarless spandex, hipsters for their midriff-level necklines. You know who has worn them while riding, though? Yours Truly. Say I am wrong and I will duel the hell out of you. Or we can just beat up some steampunks.
And I will again wear one at this year’s Seersucker Social, 4 p.m. Saturday, June 11, and I hope to see you there!