Writer. Warning: opinions. My lawyer advised a disclaimer, but didn't include any jokes to go with. Damned if I can think of any either.

Making eBay More Fun

As I stated in my 2011 goals post, I’m going to forego a big adventure this year and instead take a super huge one in 2012. Specifically, I’m going to attempt a complete traversal of the Appalachian Trail. Hopefully, any encounters I have with bears will be as mutually respectful as possible.

One of my biggest logistical concerns is for this trip is financial. I need to buy a few months of food to eat while I’m in the woods. On top of that I also won’t be making much money during that time because it will be tough to do new media marketing work without a computer.

If you are driving the back country logging roads of Virginia and see a filthy hiker offering custom site design or organic marketing services in return for freeze dried food, you’ll know I’ve run into some trouble.

Possession Divestiture
In order to get my fixed cost as low as possible while I’m gone for a few months, I’m thinning the herd on my possessions. I don’t want to pay a ton of money to store it all, and anyway I can use the money that I get by selling it all for food and other supplies.

I plan to keep things that are high quality, provide fun or fitness, or are useful for pursuing my working life. I’ll be keeping my pair of Allen Edmonds dress shoes, for example, and my guitars, but the Xbox is history, as is the big screen plasma TV. I am also donating to Goodwill any clothes I have that are in good condition but no longer fit because I’m a lot less fat than I was when I bought them.

Somewhere in metro Atlanta a Goodwill worker is wondering why someone donated a neatly folded pile of cotton circus tents.

Making Ebay Fun
Getting rid of this much stuff can be a bit of a pain, but I’m fairly well-versed in using eBay. The only problem is that so many other people are also selling their junk there, and I want to make sure that I set myself apart. As such, I have been experimenting with such devices as haiku, free verse, and even short stories in my descriptions in order to set myself apart. Here are some examples.

A Furman PL-plus Power Conditioner:

This here Furman is a power conditioner,
If you have a girl then you’re probably wishin her,
Lights light up like these lights light up.
Turn its dimmer knob and the bulbs just fire right up.
It’s got eight switchey plugs that work like a charm
Some scratches and wear, but no serious harm.
Lay down the bids for purchase-ication
And no I ain’t gonna ship to Russian Federation!

Zildjian K/Z 14″ Hi Hats:

This is a set of 14″ Zildjian hi hats that I bought some time in the early 2000s. I ended up using them for a few years playing professionally. They’re still in good condition except for two things.

First, they fell over once while I was playing on the back of a flat bed truck. There is a teeny tiny ding in the rim of the Z hat and a slightly larger one in the K hat. You can see the one in the K hat in the included photo. The Z one is too small to photo with my iPhone.

Secondly, at some point when I was living in flophouses and playing gigs, a cat took the liberty of peeing on these hi hats. I do not know for sure, but I believe it to have been a cat named Frannie Dan Dan, who was pretty much always a miserable a-hole personality wise. I wish now that I had a chance to give that cat a piece of my mind, but he has passed away, and never much cared for my perspective in any case.

A Zildjian China Trash 16″ cymbal:

sixteen inch Zildjian
china trash, miniscule crack
still makes great noises

Mind you, I don’t have any scientific data on the subject, but my feeling so far is that I get more bids and thus slightly more cash for each item thanks to having a little bit of fun with the descriptions. I still have a lot more crap to offload, so I’ll be getting a lot more experience with it over the next year.

If you have any other eBay thoughts, please let me know!

5 thoughts on “Making eBay More Fun”

  1. jim

    Some good intel in there. Thanks Mr. Brunks.

  2. howard

    Poetry is the last refuge of the desperate

  3. Michael Hawkins

    If you don’t think you need something on the AT, you don’t need it. Unless it’s very high quality boots. I did need those, but whereas I ultimately lacked them, I gained a wonderful infection and a prescription for antibiotics. And they were L.L. Bean boots at that!

    Anyway. When you get to Maine, you can feel free to contact me for anything you might need. Also, I do have a good cursory second-hand knowledge of what it’s like to do the whole trail (and first-hand knowledge of the 100 Mile Wilderness), for what it’s worth.

  4. Michael Hawkins

    I suppose a more prudent post would have been to ask if you plan on starting in Georgia.