So apparently, sucking down a latte two hours before bed is an ill-concieved idea. Well shit. At least I got it for free. The girl at Starbucks told me to just take it, she was too busy to ring me up. I think she just likes me.

This weekend was insane. I had so much fun Saturday night at Compound with the Johnny Colt show. I had enough drink tickets to get drunk, but still found myself wishing I had just one more by the end of the night. I guess that just makes me a fool.

My bartender was shaking me down for a good tip at her bar as she was pouring me a stiff one, but unfortunately for her she simultaneously spilled it on me. I tipped anyway.

I got interviewed on camera. I said I knew Johnny because he saved my life, and that I thought he smelled nice and had good hair. They probably won’t be able to use any of it.

Mark and Chris cheered me on as I was peeing. They stood outside the bathroom chanting together “Take that piss! Take that piss!” I started to dance. The wizened bathroom attendant was nonplussed. Just then another would-be pisser walked in.

“What’s goin on?” he asked.

“Just finished pissing.” I said.

“I’m about to start.” he confided.

Actually that reminds me that Friday night I walked half a city block while peeing on a wall, much to the surprise of my friends Holly and Amanda. Ah, good times.

I think it’s going to be a really good summer. I have four shows booked already for May, and June is shaping up nicely too, although it’s early to talk about that.

Yes, it’s going to be a great summer.

I just remembered that a friend remarked to me on saturday, about her roommates “They make fun of your hair, just so you know.”

Hey, if people are talking about my hair, I’m definitely doing something right.

Has anyone besides me noticed that the so-called Low Price Guarantee has a LOT of homes?

A google search for “home of the low price guarantee” turns up 374 results.

If I had that many homes I would sell some and buy some really awesome cars, like a 66 GTO.

Well, I’ve been had by FedEx once again. They have begun to employ ninjas as their delivery people. No longer do they conspicuously knock on your door and then get you to sign for your package. Instead, they sneak quietly up to the door and put a sign on it stating that you didn’t answer, then take the package back to their hub so you have to come get it.

Seriously, they don’t knock anymore. If I want to catch my FedEx ninja, I have to wait around all day outside my door, hiding in the bushes with a blowgun.

Jerks.

UPDATE: The above post garnered this response from Dan Moyles.

Dan Moyles (djmoyles@fedex.com) wrote:
Jim, FedEx is committed to attempting delivery of your packages on 3 consecutive days. Our drivers would prefer to leave your package at the door (if applicable), or have you sign for it on the day it arrives, instead of coming back 2 more times. If you leave a note on the door indicating that you are home, and get to know your driver, I’m sure you wouldn’t feel like we employ “ninjas” any longer. I will be glad to follow up in more detail if you prefer, you have my email address. Thanks.

Dan Moyles is an excellent representative of FedEx, and I appreciate his comments. He offered to help me with my situation and even offered to personally investigate the whereabouts of my package. That’s awesome customer service. I didn’t even contact FedEx, he just happened to be reading my page, I gather.

His suggestion was that I get to know my driver, and ask personally for him/her to knock louder, or perhaps leave a note asking the driver to do so. That’s fine and dandy, and in the future I guess that’s what I will do, but it still seems like knocking on the door when trying to deliver a package that requires a signature should go without saying.

When I was in line today, trying to pick up my package, there was a gentleman ahead of me with exactly the same predicament that I had the day before. He had his ticket for his package, but they sent it out on the truck already so he’d have to come back the next day to get it. He lived even farther away from the FedEx hub than I do, too, so he’s extra screwed.

Have I ever mentioned how much I love running? I just went for a little over three miles and I feel like a new man. I really, really needed that.

THANK YOU, LEGS!

Come out and catch me this weekend at CJ’s Landing Donkey Party. It’s a lot of fun. I will be playing a two hour set of whatever the fuck I want to play, and Jon Morrison has promised to dress up like an indian.

Hell yeah.

Johnny was moving back and forth between the Kaoss pad and a micro Korg synth, and Wonder was on the decks.

“We need to get another one of these for this thing,” JC mused, referring to the Micro Korg.

“Or I could just run the whole mix through it so you could use it for both.” I offered.

“You can do that?” wondered Wonder.

“Wonder, Please.”