Searcharoo

A local radio station, Dave FM is running a contest, the winner of which gets to play at Bonnaroo. Today my roommate Sam Thacker and I went to go enter ourselves.

We showed up at the starbucks where Mara Davis, 92.9 DJ was doing her remote. We read the agreements that they wanted us to sign and gave them our discs. Sam had a nice press kit put together. I had the monstrosity pictured above.

My disc isn’t pressed yet, so of course it’s a burned CD. I didn’t really have anything to put in there for a booklet, so I printed out a piece of paper on my shitty printer (note pinstripe effect… not intentional), and cut it to fit with a kitchen knife.

I put “Please listen to me! :)” on the outside, so I hope they will.

The girl who took my CD and my waiver picked up my CD.

“Is this yours…? Face melting…?” she said. I felt embarassed.

“Yeah that’s mine.”

Anyway, as soon as we were done dropping our CDs off, Mara waved us over to her tent where she was broadcasting. She stood there thoughtfully for a few minutes, and then we were on the air. She pointed the mic at me.

“What’s your name?” she asked into her headset mic, pointing a wireless at my face.

“Jim Hodgson,” I said, being careful to enunciate.

“And what’s your band name?”

“Jim Hodgson.” I said, carefully again.

“Oh okay, and what makes you think you can rock Bonnaroo?”

“Well… ” I said, at a loss, “I am very tall.”

She laughed, and then turned to Sam.

“What about you? What’s your name?”

“Sam Thacker.”

“And what’s your band name?”

“Sam Thacker.” he said.

“Oh! We’re getting all the solo artists today! What makes you think YOU can rock Bonnaroo?”

“Well, like Jim I am also quite tall. I don’t think they are ready for him, though.”

“Oh no?” she said, swinging the wireless to me again.

“He doesn’t think they can take me.” I said.

She wasn’t phased at all by our inanity. “Okay! Now I hear that you musician types get a lot of chicks. Is that true?”

“I wouldn’t know about that.. ” Sam said into her mic.

“I’m actually a chicken farmer, so…” I said. I still don’t know what the hell that is supposed to mean.

“Oh! You’re funny!” she said, giving me a playful shove.

I don’t think anyone heard me being an idiot on DaveFM, and I’m mad about that. I didn’t get any “HOLY SHIT I HEARD YOU!” phone calls. Damnit!

Anyway, hopefully I will win the contest and get to play Bonnaroo!

UPDATE: I didn’t win. The winning bands were Paul Warner & Nova Milo, Sodajerk, GOLDEN, and Big City Sunrise, as you can see here until they take the page down.

As you might imagine, I hate every last member of these bands with the explosive rage of a thousand atomic bombs and I hope they are never, ever able to purchase properly-fitting underwear again, causing discomfort to their dangly parts. That is, except for Matthew of Nova Milo, who got in touch to say that he doesn’t wear underpants.