I got through the viewing. I had to make two more trips out to the car for shots of whiskey, but I made it through. I thanked everyone who spoke to me for coming.
Some of my oldest friends came out to see me, even though we haven’t been in good touch over the years thanks to me being slack about it. It really meant a lot to me that they would do that. My roommates Sam and Mellie also turned up. It was great.
I began to notice during the viewing the distinct differences between the way people talked to my sister and me. They shared memories with her, cried, and generally stirred up as many emotions as possible. I was grateful to talk to anyone who wanted to talk about anything but my deceased mom. I tried to smile through the few people who wanted to remember her in a tearful soliloquy, but most people seemed to realize that I wasn’t hip.
After the viewing I really wanted to go out and eat with my friends, but my Dad and his significant other Steve had dinner planned. I didn’t want to disappoint, so we all went over. It was really nice, Dad and Steve really know how to entertain.
Afterwards, Sam and Mellie and I went out for a beer at the bar I hung out in when I was living in Montgomery. IT was good to get out and not think about family any more than necessary. I kept it to one beer, though, since the service was the following morning at 9am and Dad was promising to get us all up at 6:30 since we had so many people to get through the showering and dressing process. By my calculations, we didn’t need that much time, but I was too tired to argue the point, and I figure it’s better to be ready early than late.
I couldn’t sleep. I never sleep well in unfamiliar surroundings. I have a ritual that I follow to go to bed, and if I have to deviate from it because I am in a strange place then I take forever to go to sleep.
I thought about mom. Cars drove by and cast oddly-angled patches of light on the walls that roamed around over Dad’s many paintings. I listened to a book on my ipod until I felt tired enough to sleep, but I lay awake after I took it off for a long time. I can never sleep anywhere but my own bed at night.
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