Monthly Archives: September 2003

The Bearilla

By jim | Published: September 30, 2003
I was doing a Thursday night gig with the Hawk at the Irish pub down in Buckhead. Shamus’ gig across the street was so dead that he closed up early and came over to play with us. I was standing to the left of the stage with a speaker very close to my head. This [...]
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Boob-O-Meter

By jim | Published: September 24, 2003
I was out the other night with my lady friend watching a few of my buddies play a gig at a local establishment when McLemore, the bass player, decided he needed a piss. So, he held up his bass to indicate I should come up and play it while he peed. I went up and [...]
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Laugh it up

By jim | Published: September 22, 2003
Walter and I were at the pizza place with the humorless girl at the counter. Now, I sort of pride myself on being able to make pretty much anyone laugh, so this girl is a bit of a conundrum in that I have never been able to get a smile out of her. I explained [...]
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another thursday

By jim | Published: September 17, 2003
Walter and I were hanging out at the Irish pub having a few drinks and watching some friends play their gig. I was getting pretty close to drunk after a number of beers and assorted shots of Jager. Some girls next to us told me I looked like their friend Bill and wanted to know [...]
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Da Vinci and Wierd Al

By jim | Published: September 15, 2003
My brother in law is kind of like a bike riding genius. He can do Jackie Chan shit on a bike, like hop onto a rock and stop with his front tire in the air, then hop around in a circle, hit the front tire, then ride out. It’s crazy to watch him. I actually [...]
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fucking this cat

By jim | Published: September 11, 2003
Due to a lot of troubles with his 77 Ford Bronco, Walter enlisted my help to remove the gas tank and check the fuel lines. That fucking Bronco of his is a hole in the world that exists only to consume money. You can’t convince him of that, though. I wasn’t aware that one could [...]
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ass bombs

By jim | Published: September 10, 2003
I wish that the day after I was born an evil genius had stolen me from the hospital and installed a missile launcher in my ass that fired small but extremely explosive guided missiles out of my butt. This would enable me to bend over and instantly demolish anything I felt like demolishing. At this [...]
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lock the taskbar

By jim | Published: September 5, 2003
Okay people. ALl of you using Windows XP out there, I want you to put your mouse down by the start button, and move it just to the right. Now right click. Now sing along with me!SHARIF HE DON’T LIKE ITLOCK THE TASKBARLOCK THE TASKBARSHARIF HE DON’T LIKE IT.. This is not kosher!LOCK THE TASKBARLOCK [...]
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The Loaf says no.

By jim | Published: September 2, 2003
Hi Jim: Thanks for your interest in Creative Loafing, but We aren’t in the market for freelance humor columns at this time. We’re a pretty strictly formatted paper, and we just don’t have a slot for it. The majority of freelance articles we run are in the Vibes and Food & Drink sections, with occasional [...]
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Shameless cry for help

By jim | Published: September 1, 2003
Okay people, I’m embarking on a quest to get published in a real live publication, and I need your assistance. I’d like to know which entries you guys like best so I can use those ideas to make my submissions. Check out my message board at http://hodgson.networkgeek.org and go to the Entry-O-Rama section to vote. [...]
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